Thoughts on Malcolm and Marie
5 Things You Can Do To Get Out of A Funk
How to Tell People No
How to Love Yourself
So, what did I learn?
Heal. Be Present. Love yourself. Be patient with yourself, others, and life.
Healing is necessary to be present in all the decisions we make in life. Self-care is crucial to acknowledge the pain we feel. We cannot fix something that we refuse to see. If we choose to run from pain and discomfort, we miss an opportunity to unpack it, dig deeper, and grow. Suppose we can understand that nothing is against us? Everything that is happening is happening for us and is an opportunity. It is a lesson and opportunity for something better, whatever relationship that did not work out, or job we did not keep, or car that got wrecked. And if we always have ourselves. We can persevere through all things.The reasons that people say ”you need to love yourself before you love someone else” are countless. What comes to my mind immediately is that I accept behaviors that I would not tolerate when I do not love myself. During these times, I am defenseless and not entirely participating in life.
Thoughts on Police Reform - Defund the Police
Getting Married Is Not An Accomplishment?
I read an article on Valentine's Day that stated that getting married is not an accomplishment for a woman. That woman should be applauded more for their educational and work contributions. Marriage is not an accomplishment?
I was married two years, four months and nine days. 860 days and it was an accomplishment deserving of an Olympic medal. Even newly divorced I feel that women should not have to choose what we celebrate. Why do women have to choose between celebrating our career, our academic accomplishments, being a mother, and having a successful marriage. Discouraging a woman from celebrating love is just as repressive as paying us less for our work. I was disappointed that a woman felt compelled to disparage another woman's choice. Because I don't know the author I have left room for misunderstanding on my end.
Defining Actions and Forgiveness - One time and you're a thief?
How to Be a Bad Friend in Ten Steps
Friends. How many of us have them? We all know the song. Friendship has been the cornerstone of human society since it began. Whether related or not, finding our human as a child is a priority. Life is hard. Having Someone there to hold your hand always makes it that much easier. If you are lucky, you go through childhood, high school, and young adult years with a partner in crime. And then things slowly begin to change.
Suddenly you are no longer a young adult, and the rose-colored glasses and alcohol-induced euphoria has subsided. Suddenly you are questioning your friendships. After all, life teaches us that the benefit of the doubt diminishes with age.
An Empty Glass - Suicide is not the Answer
Suicide is not the Answer!
"Melancholy may enter your soul, and ambush your happiness; but it will prepare you for true joy. Melancholy drives out all other emotions and feelings, so the source of all goodness may occupy the whole house. It shakes the yellow leaves from the tree, allowing fresh leaves to grow. It pulls up old bodily pleasures by the roots, allowing divine spiritual pleasures to be planted. Melancholy takes many things from the soul, in order to bring better things in return". -Rumi
And that is where I found myself one day in my late 20’s. Filled with melancholy and heavy with a depression that made my skin hurt. I was no longer able to find joy in anything. Not in being a mother, which has been one of my life's greatest joys, not in exercise, food, or sex. I just wanted to die, but I was too afraid do anything about it. As I lay down to sleep each night I was okay if I didn't wake up the next morning. I was tired of existing.
But hurting yourself is not the answer. And if your attempt is unsuccessful, there are painful tubes and an unintended vacation to locked parts of the hospital. A long story for another time. The point is this getting to a place where you can no longer find ANYTHING worth living for, even your child, is sad to think about. It’s even worse to live through. But I did. I survived. And so will you.
Was it Sexual Assault?
The Imperfect Lemonade
Joy, Happiness and Resilience
Beginnings, Resistance and What is The Perfect Lemonade?
Using the word perfect can be misleading. Overcoming life’s adversities is not easy and there is not a “perfect” way to live. Whatever our struggle, our lives CAN be lived with purpose. We can find our deeper meaning and we can begin living our lives with balance. And that is what the perfect lemonade is about.